Jokes - Dating Jokes

Dating Jokes. Men vs Women .Funny and Humorous Dating Jokes These dating jokes expose the humor in dating and the differences between males and females

Yuppie Women Father to Yuppette's boyfriend, who arrived to take her on a date: "She'll be right down. Care for a game of chess ?" One Yuppette to another: "He likes my company, and I just love his. I think it's called the First Fidelity Trust." Two Yuppet

You Know the Honeymoon Is Over When ... Talking dirty in bed means shouting obscenities when he hogs the blanket. Chivalry's as dead as the door he lets slam in your face. PMS lasts all month. Your jumbo box of absorbent maxi-pads is on open display. "Honey, what are

Why Motorcycles Are Better Than Women Motorcycle curves never sag. You can ride a motorcycle any day of the month. Motorcycles don't whine unless something is REALLY wrong. You can kick your motorcycle to wake it up. You can share your motorcycle with friends. Motorcycles

Why Kissing Is Good for YOU! ...it helps prevent tooth decay. Dr. Peter Gorden, Dental Advisor at the British Dental Association, explains. "After eating, your mouth is full of sugar solution and acidic saliva, which cause plaque build up. Kissing is nature's own cleaning process,&quo

Why It's Great to be a Woman We got off the Titanic first. We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game. Taxis stop for us. We don't look like a f

Why Fishing is Better than Sex A big, juicy worm always gets a fish excited. You don't have to eat a fish while it's still flopping around. You can take a leak in the bush anytime you want. Stroking your rod won't piss off a trout. Sipping a beer and scratchi

Why Cybersex is Better If the date goes bad, changing your Screen Name is easier then changing your real name. Bathing, dressing, supplying atmosphere is optional. If you get drunk and blackout, you only wake up next to a keyboard. You can exercis

Why Cookie Dough is Better than Men It's enjoyable hard or soft.   It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.   It doesn't mind if you take your anger out on it.   You always want to swallow.   It w

Why Chocolate is Better than Sex You can GET chocolate. "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. You can make chocolate last

Why Boys and Girls Are Equal But Not the Same "Equal" is not always synonymous with "the same." Men and women are created equal. But, boys and girls are not born the same. You throw a little girl a ball, and it will hit her in the nose. You throw a little b

Why Aren't You Married Yet? You haven't asked yet. I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life. What? And spoil my great sex life? Nobody would believe me in white. Just lucky, I guess. It gives my mother something to live for. My fiancee is awaiting his/her

Why A Man Can't Win If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework, you are a pansy. If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you are a good for

Which is the Better Invention? Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the gates, the guy tells Ford, "Well, you've been such a good guy and your invention the car changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want in heaven." So Henry Ford thinks about it

When You Are Caught... A personal guide to what men should say when caught looking at another woman by your wife/girlfriend. I can't believe that outfit she is wearing. (Said disdainfully) Look at that guy... over there... behind the woman. I think that's

What Men Are Like Men are like.....Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, full-bodied, and can keep you up all night long. Men are like.....Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. Men are like.....Blenders. You nee

What I Want in a Man What I Want in a Man (age 22) Handsome Charming Financially successful A caring listener Witty In good shape Dresses with style Appreciates finer things Full of thoughtful surprises An imaginative, romantic lover, e

What Every Young Girl Should Know About Men How... "Big"... Should a Man Be? Don't by shy. It's an important question, and one surrounded by confusion. The average man's penis is 2 1/2 to 3 inches long. Men substantially larger than this must often undergo painful surgery

What Every Man Expects in a Wife She will always be beautiful and cheerful. She could marry a movie star, but wants only you. She will have hair that never needs curlers or beauty shops. Her beauty won't run in a rainstorm. She will never be sick--just allergic t

What a Man Says "These flowers are for you." "Can I have your number?" "You look beautiful." "I've enjoyed tonight." "What we have is special." "I love you."

What a Man Hears What a woman says: This place is a mess! C'mon, You and I need to clean up, Your stuff is lying on the floor and you'll have no clothes to wear if we don't do laundry right now! What a man hears: blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON YOU AND I blah, blah, bl